舍尔

Ever had the feeling of having your mood swinging everyday?

I do.

I am the one who does not have a stable mindset to go through everyday,

sometimes angry, sometimes happy, sometimes moody, sometimes feeling so lifeless.

And what I've figured out is not about blaming other people but to blame myself by mixing with the wrong bunch of people.

I mean, it's not wrong to mix with them, 

unless you're able to control your attitude.

I am not those kind of person who can controls my emotion or attitude.

When I get excited, i tend to hurt someone,

and when I have my mood down, (which is my current situation)

I'll try to be quiet and started thinking "why am I the one who always bully people and hurting people?"

Depressing huh.

Well, I don't know how long can this thing last but I hope it'll gone forever,

I don't wanna hurt anyone else anymore,

I love being myself,

I like the way how I look but it doesn't look the same as how the others look at me.

But,

I guess this personality of mine is a blessing from God :)

I love being alone,

and I didn't mean that I don't like to make friends.

I like to go out with friends sometimes but...

I still prefer to go out alone when I need to get something for myself.

There are few reasons as well,

1) i don't need to concern about how boring they are if I went for my shopping.

2) I can just have a sudden plan rather than following the plan we've planned earlier.

3) It can be more relaxed.

4) I do not need to follow what they wanted to do.

Friends doesn't know me quite well, because I never tell them how I actually feel. They asked, but I insist not to share it out, even if I did, who will be the one helping me with these problems? Its true that problems needed to be expressed out, they may not help you, but you must be able to find out the problems within you.

Never ever keep it to yourself (but I still keep it for myself), tell it out, share it out as all these problems may be solved within few hours if we shared it out and discuss it together.

This will be my last blog for today.